Friday, August 1, 2008

I Could've Been...

There are times when I can't help but wonder if at some point in my young life I just stopped believing. I used to dream of being a teacher, an artist, an animator, a graphic designer, a computer programmer, a web developer, a photographer, a magazine writer and a few other random interests that came into my head at any given point. Some of them were mostly just dreams. I probably didn't have much (if any) experience or skills. Others were a bit more possible (such as teaching or art fields). I think my problem was that I could never really decide on one main thing I wanted to focus on. So all through college I just took many classes that interested me, got my degree and then just hit the working world. A regular ol' 40-hour-week office job. Sure, it's for a company that's in a field I was interested in. But the job itself didn't exactly turn out to be what I had in mind back when I used to think about my future jobs.

So I don't know. They say it's never too late to go back to school and whatnot. But honestly, I don't think I have it in me anymore. I can barely get enough energy to get myself to work! lol I don't want to have to worry about night classes and all that again. Maybe it makes me look lazy, but that's just me. I enjoy my off time. I love being with my family, friends, partner or just myself, taking in my hobbies. In the end, being able to do all those things is what really gets me through each working day.

I know I'm not exactly at retirement age yet, so anything can still happen. Who knows, next new job I get might end up being something I love and probably never imagined. (Cross your fingers!) Still, I just can't help but wonder if at some point I lost a step toward a promising creative/artistic type career that I'd always imagined. Maybe I should've gone to an arts college? There was a point where I was even looking at the brochures. But oh well, can't dwell too much on the past can we? I just gotta be grateful for what I do have now. And hopefully the future will offer a bit more. :)

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