Tough Day at Work

Today started out quite normally. Went in to work, doing what I would normally do. I knew we had a meeting, for the whole office, with the "big boss." Me, being ever the optimist, wasn't fully expecting what he had to say...though at the same time, I kinda knew he would. I guess I was just HOPING he wouldn't. But sure enough, he said it. There would be layoffs at the office today.

We were each going to meet with our department head, to find out if we stay or go. The meeting was at 10am. I didn't get my meeting until around 2pm! So for at least four hours, I had to sit and TRY to work, while the nervousness and fear ate away at me a bit. And again, Mr. Optimist, I just kept calm, telling myself that hopefully they still needed me around. That hopefully my five years and counting there would help me out.

When it was finally my turn to go to his office, I was nervous. For some reason, as soon as I entered, I told myself..."This is it...I'm not coming back." He started out by talking about how it's been a tough day and that these decisions have nothing to do with anyone's job performance, good or bad. I was kinda hoping he'd start off just saying "you're going" or "you're staying" right off the bat. But instead, he kinda just threw it in among his other sentences. I can't even recall exactly how he said it. But as soon as he did, I was able to relax a bit more.

So yes, I'm very relieved I still have a job for the time being. Just how long that "time" will be for, it remains to be seen. It was still very sad to know that several people in our office wouldn't be coming back on Tuesday after the holiday. :( I only know of a few people that for sure were let go. The office closed early today, so I think some people just went home early but will be back next week. I'll have a more clear idea of who was left once I get back on Tuesday. I'm sure it's goig to feel weird though. A major mood shift in the office. As someone put it, it's like those of us that stayed are just prolonging the inevitable.

Come Tuesday, I'm just going to go in and keep my head held high and do my best, just as I've always done. But at the same time, I need to be realistic. I'm going to be updating my resumes, putting myself out there and keeping my eyes and ears open for new possibilities.

I wish nothing but the best for all those that were let go today. Despite my being kind of a recluse at work, I do know that all my coworkers have been an awesome group of people!